01 May 2015

disappearing. wish i had a name for feeling nothing. ("The Blues Can't Even Find Me" by John Hiatt)



Lyrics

World is closin' in on me
Don't know what to do
Can't see the big picture anymore
If there's even one to view

Wife keeps pushin' buttons
Spend all day starin' at a little screen
I'm feelin' invisible
The blues can't even find me

Wish I had a name for feelin' nothin'
Wish I still had my old address
Where anyone could come on over
And just put me in a mess

Now I'm tellin' everybody
When we'll be takin' our next breath
Blues can't even find me
Like we never even met

She cried all the way to Memphis
With the kids in back
And only me to talk it out with
Used to be like that

Now there's fifty people in the car
And the kids are grown
And I've heard her side fifty times
Talkin' on her cell phone

Now we're just so lonely
And there's no turnin' back
It's virtually impossible
But I can live with that

I wouldn't want in on this train wreck
Wouldn't wanna be on this last date
Now the blues can't even find me
All I know to do is wait

Now the blues can't even find me
All I know to do is wait


Holden Caulfield:

"Anyway, I kept walking and walking up Fifth Avenue, without any tie on or anything. Then all of a sudden, something very spooky started happening. Every time I came to the end of a block and stepped off the goddam curb, I had this feeling that I'd never get to the other side of the street. I thought I'd just go down, down, down, and nobody'd ever see me again. Boy, did it scare me. You can't imagine. I started sweating like a bastard – my whole shirt and underwear and everything. Then I started doing something else. Every time I'd get to the end of a block I'd make believe I was talking to my brother Allie. I'd say to him, "Allie, don't let me disappear. Allie, don't let me disappear. Allie, don't let me disappear. Please, Allie." And then when I'd reach the other side of the street without disappearing, I'd thank him. Then it would start all over again as soon as I got to the next corner. But I kept going and all. I was sort of afraid to stop, I think – I don't remember, to tell you the truth. I know I didn't stop till I was way up in the Sixties, past the zoo and all. Then I sat down on this bench. I could hardly get my breath, and I was still sweating like a bastard. I sat there, I guess, for about an hour."

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